But, as graduation comes near, it makes me think about my graduation and how my life has changed so much. I never thought I wouldn't be getting a four year degree. I never thought I'd be living back in Austin. I never imagined my life in the medical field. And with all that comes the good and bad. I have lost a lot of friends from college that I thought would be in my life forever. And I gained some amazing friends there that I know I can always turn to (love all you hope people).
I never dreamt I lose a grandparent as fast as I did. I also never realized how much I'd miss him, even if he was a little crazy. He was crazy in the best way. My grandfather passed away in January of this year. He fought hard, but now he is breathing easy with his wife. Pulmonary fibrosis sucks and I'm just going to leave it at that. I had the honor of having him at my graduation, but unfortunately Meaghan doesn't and neither will the nine younger ones. I count myself lucky that I got to spend almost twenty years with a great man who had a great heart. I will surely miss him embarrassing me and his quirky British accent that he always spoke in. (Disclaimer: he isn't British) He will certainly be on our minds this week while we celebrate Meaghan and all her accomplishments.
Never, in my wildest dreams, did I imagine I'd be where I am today. It's still hard for me to accept that right now, I'm not getting a degree or pursuing the career I thought was what I was supposed to do. I still love working with special needs children, they are my heart, but that is no longer the career I am pursuing. It's hard to get good grades when you just don't want to. I felt like a failure, and to be honest, still do. I watch my classmates and my colleges friends having the time of their life in college and I'm not doing that. Don't get me wrong, I love my school. I really, really do. And I'm doing really well. My clinical gets me excited about my future and I love all that I'm learning, but it's not how I saw my life. My school is different. It's the school you go back to, not the one you start at. So a lot of my classmates are married and have kids. It makes school different. One of my teachers is closer to my age then some of my classmates. But my school is fun and I'm excited to have a career as a medical assistant. And the cool thing is that I have options. I have options to pursue my career further through Virginia college if I want. And I know my parents will support me along the way, whether I chose to stay a MA or continue on to something else.
Never could I have predicted that I would still be nannying. I can't explain to yall how much I love the kids I nanny and their families. I would do just about anything for them. I love my newest little addition into my heart,baby macquarie. I love baby snuggles. They are literally the best. Being a nanny is one of the most rewarding jobs, because i know that the kids love me, maybe not as much as I love them, but they love me. Being able to watch them grow up and letting them teach me things is so fun. I would be a nanny forever if I could. Being with the kids I nanny, even when they are throwing fits, brings me so much joy. Even when I want to pull my hair out, I still love my job. And I'm so thankful for the families that trust me with their precious cargo. Nannying makes me happy and I'm so thankful I am able to continue with it. 
Life is funny sometimes and I'm sure on a crazy ride. But life would be boring if it were predictable. I think you'll just have to stay tuned to see where I'm headed next in this crazy thing I call life.
I love you all!
-jessica
