The most heartbreaking thing

As most of you know, I got a dog three weeks ago that I named Luna. I loved Luna and she loved me. But she didn't really love a whole lot of other people. Basically, she just loved me. She started nipping at my family and my dogs so I took her to Behavior training that the shelter I got her from offers for free. I thought it would all improve and by the time I moved into my apartment, all would be well. Now, let me clear somethings up, Luna is not nor will ever be a mean dog. She nips out of fear and anxiety and sometimes defensiveness. In three weeks, this dog had become my whole world and I was willing to do whatever it took to be able to keep her. I scheduled an appointment in Friday because the night before she had tried to nip my sister. She had never fully bit anyone but it was only a matter of time. My mom came with me to the meeting. I was hoping they would be able to give me a more aggressive action plan to help

Luna feel comfortable and not be threatened to bite. 

Unfortunately, that was not how the meeting went. They suggested that a surrender Luna back to the shelter to find her a better home where she could get more help. Like was the most heartbreaking thing I had ever heard. I just started crying. I didn't have an option. I would have to surrender my dog the next day back to the shelter. I cried for the remainder of the day. I more like sobbed. I was so upset that the dog I loved so much and had done nothing wrong her in book, had to be given back.

It was the hardest thing I've had to do. On my way to work this morning, after saying my final goodbye to her, I cried the whole way there. 

I knew I needed to find a new dog and somewhat quickly because otherwise I knew I would just cry for days. I went to a place with the kid I nanny just to see what dogs they had. The guy on the phone said he had some really cute teacup poodles. So I went and looked. And let's just say I didn't leave empty handed. I came home with the cutest little 10 week old apricot teacup poodle. I named him Oliver (Ollie for short). 

Now I know it seems fast, considering my dad took Luna to the shelter today, but I knew she was never coming back. And I am still completely heartbroken, but being distracted by Ollie has helped. And he is the cutest little two pound dog ever. Full grown he is expected to weigh about 4 pounds. He's very sweet and playful and has been excellent so far. 

Ollie and I have had a very long day and we are pooped. I love my little baby boy and I am very thankful for my parents who let me bring my little boy home. I'm excited to see what the future holds and I can only pray that my sweet Luna finds the perfect home for her. I will always love her. 

I love you all! 

-Jessica. 

MAJOR LIFE CHANGES!!!

Wow, I have been meaning to write this post for days now but I feel like I never have the energy or the time! So now, I'm taking the time.

So, a lot has changed since my last post. A LOT. These last couple weeks have been a whirlwind of changes and a lot of upcoming excitement!

Let's start.

First, I'M MOVING OUT! I am really excited. I am moving more downtown so my drive won't be as long to school! I will have three roommates, none whom I have met yet. I move in August 15/16! I will have a nice big bedroom with my own bathroom! I'm currently am trying to get my room all packed up and everything that I need bought because I don't have much time before I move out!

I also got a dog!! Her name is Luna. I named her Luna because I wanted it to have something to do with me being in school for medical assisting. Luna came from the Pulmonary Semilunar valve you have in your heart! You have one on each side. So Luna, is a piece of my heart! (Aw, so cute). I rescued her from Austin Pet's Alive in Austin. Well, I didn't really adopt her; she adopted me. She came from a shelter in San Antonio that was out of room. I guess a couple in SA were trying to adopt her but found that she would run or nip at them. She has never bitten anyone, but she sure has tried. We don't really know much about her history except that she was found as a stray. She was obviously someones pet though. She is completely housebroken, knows sit and down, and listens very well when I tell her no. She is a flight-risk which makes it a little hard when someone opens a door or I take her anywhere. If Luna takes off running, she isn't going to stop. Hopefully that will change. She is a chihuahua/terrier mix. She looks like a giant chihuahua. She totally has the chihuahua face and ears but she's huge. She is a chihuahua on steroids. She is very sweet and loving to me and commands my attention at all times, or whoever is close to her. She only likes women for some reason.  I think she may have been abused by a man. We definitely have things to work on, but I am really excited to have her. And she is so cute. She has the biggest ears!

That's about it for my big life changes! I feel like a real adult now!

I love you all!
-Jessica

Welcome to the stab lab

So, I finally started phlebotomy. I had been waiting for this all quarter. I couldn't wait to learn how to draw blood. But, drawing blood is scary. You literally have to stick a needle in someone else's arm and pray to God that you get blood in the tube. There are also a lot more that goes into drawing blood then I realized. There are different tubes for different tests and it's a lot to remember. There is a specific angle that your needle needs to be when you enter into the vein. There is a specific way to hold the needle and push in the vaccutainer. But, even though I have to remember all of that, it is really fun. I am officially addicted to taking peoples blood. I found myself looking at the guys on the bachelorette last night and seeing who had good veins for a blood draw and I think it's clear to say that everyone in my class is in the same boat. The first time you get blood into the tube it's like a big sigh of relief. I didn't miss the vein and my classmate isn't crying in pain. Then you think to yourself, hey maybe I can take blood. I have to say that the fake arm was way more nerve racking than actually sticking someones arm. DISCLAIMER TO THE FAKE ARM MANUFACTURERS: They don't feel real, so you should try to make them better.

I'm going to brag on myself right now: Brandon (a fellow classmate) and I were the only ones that were allowed to take blood without our teacher watching. *hair flip*

Well, its finals week so this post is going to be short, but I am definitely going miss this class. Of course, I have the same teacher next semester so it's going to be awesome.

I love you all!

-Jessica

Looking at the facts

Y'all, my baby sister is graduating from high school this week. There is no way that is possible. But, I am so happy and incredibly proud of all she has accomplished. My sister got into UT and even more impressively the McCombs business school. She is so smart. She's graduating in the top 10% of her class. I could not be prouder to call her my sister. 

But, as graduation comes near, it makes me think about my graduation and how my life has changed so much. I never thought I wouldn't be getting a four year degree. I never thought I'd be living back in Austin. I never imagined my life in the medical field. And with all that comes the good and bad. I have lost a lot of friends from college that I thought would be in my life forever. And I gained some amazing friends there that I know I can always turn to (love all you hope people). 

I never dreamt I lose a grandparent as fast as I did. I also never realized how much I'd miss him, even if he was a little crazy. He was crazy in the best way. My grandfather passed away in January of this year. He fought hard, but now he is breathing easy with his wife. Pulmonary fibrosis sucks and I'm just going to leave it at that. I had the honor of having him at my graduation, but unfortunately Meaghan doesn't and neither will the nine younger ones. I count myself lucky that I got to spend almost twenty years with a great man who had a great heart. I will surely miss him embarrassing me and his quirky British accent that he always spoke in. (Disclaimer: he isn't British) He will certainly be on our minds this week while we celebrate Meaghan and all her accomplishments. 

Never, in my wildest dreams, did I imagine I'd be where I am today. It's still hard for me to accept that right now, I'm not getting a degree or pursuing the career I thought was what I was supposed to do. I still love working with special needs children, they are my heart, but that is no longer the career I am pursuing. It's hard to get good grades when you just don't want to. I felt like a failure, and to be honest, still do. I watch my classmates and my colleges friends having the time of their life in college and I'm not doing that. Don't get me wrong, I love my school. I really, really do. And I'm doing really well. My clinical gets me excited about my future and I love all that I'm learning, but it's not how I saw my life. My school is different. It's the school you go back to, not the one you start at. So a lot of my classmates are married and have kids. It makes school different. One of my teachers is closer to my age then some of my classmates. But my school is fun and I'm excited to have a career as a medical assistant. And the cool thing is that I have options. I have options to pursue my career further through Virginia college if I want. And I know my parents will support me along the way, whether I chose to stay a MA or continue on to something else. 

Never could I have predicted that I would still be nannying. I can't explain to yall how much I love the kids I nanny and their families. I would do just about anything for them. I love my newest little addition into my heart,baby macquarie. I love baby snuggles. They are literally the best. Being a nanny is one of the most rewarding jobs, because i know that the kids love me, maybe not as much as I love them, but they love me. Being able to watch them grow up and letting them teach me things is so fun. I would be a nanny forever if I could. Being with the kids I nanny, even when they are throwing fits, brings me so much joy. Even when I want to pull my hair out, I still love my job. And I'm so thankful for the families that trust me with their precious cargo. Nannying makes me happy and I'm so thankful I am able to continue with it. 

Life is funny sometimes and I'm sure on a crazy ride. But life would be boring if it were predictable. I think you'll just have to stay tuned to see where I'm headed next in this crazy thing I call life. 

I love you all! 

-jessica

THE BABY IS HERE!!

The baby is here and he is precious. He was born today at 4:31am weighing in at a whopping 9 pounds and 3 ounces and he was 21 inches long. I won't share his name with you yet, because the family has not made it official and I think it should be them to share it. So once they share it, I'll happily let yall know. I went and saw him today and oh man he is so so precious. 

Mom, Amanda, is doing great! When I saw her today, she did not look like she had giving birth 10 hours before. She looked awesome. 

I think Dad, mike, was more tired than mom. 

I was there for several hours and spent some time snuggling with the baby! Soo precious. And then rai came in and met his baby and that was awesome to see. 

In other news, ford is a rockstar. I went and saw him in his school of rock show and he killed it. Proud nanny moment! He was so good! It was a Rolling Stones show. Ford not only played the guitar but also the bass and he sang. And he was a rockstar. It was an awesome show. All the kids did amazing! 

It's been such a crazy couple of days but super fun! Thanks for reading!

I love you all!

-Jessica 

Do I look sexy in my boot?

So for the last couple of days I've been sporting this really really cute walking shoe. And I mean it's so cute everyone is jealous. Just kidding, it's horribly ugly. 

So, now I'll tell you why I'm sporting this fabulous walking shoe. 

I caught a glass patio table top with my foot. 

My mom ordered this patio set from Amazon and the table arrived first before the chairs. I left my house for like thirty minutes and my mom had set up the patio table, inside the house. Now, I'm not quite sure what her logic was besides the fact that she didn't feel like setting it up outside, but she decided to set it up in the middle of our dining room. So, while it was Intransport to the outside where it belongs, the glass slipped out of the table and landed directly onto my foot. So now I'm waiting on the results of if its fractured or not. 

In other news, Rai helped my win a $25 gift card to sonic for just merely being cute. That's one thing he's really good at. So I rewarded him with ice cream(don't tell mom). But, it was only a little bit and he had gone that day with out any accidents that we know about, so I think it was well deserved. Thanks Anne Hudson at Kase 101 for the awesome gift card. 

Ford wants me to buy an Apple watch. Yes, they look cool, but I'm not sure I need one. I have a Fitbit charge HR that tracks my sleep, it has the time, my exercise, my steps, the flights of stairs I go up, and the amount of calories I've burned. It also has a battery Life of like 5 days. My wrist will vibrate if I have an incoming call and will wake me up with a silent alarm if I set it to do so. The most Important thing to me besides the heart rate is the sleep. I love that it automatically tracks my sleep. The Apple watch doesn't have that ability. Ford told me to wear the apple watch during the day and my Fitbit at night. But I would probably sell my Fitbit If I got an Apple watch. I just can't justify the purchase of an apple watch. Ford is going to try to convince me. It's like I want One, but I don't need one, unless there is a significant upside that I'm not seeing. I could pay for about 1/2 of my apple watch with the money from my Fitbit. But is the Apple watch really worth it? Is it worth the money? I'd love to hear your opinions on this. You can leave me a comment on here or the link on Facebook or even text me. 

Anyway that's just a snippet into my week so far. I'm trying to kill time before I have to go babysit. Time is moving really slow. I'm trying really hard to think of more things to write but I can't. 

Uhhh, schools good. I'm official now. I got my med bag which has a sphygmomanometer (blood pressure cuff) and a stethoscope so that's super fun. Listening to bowel sounds grosses me out. And I'm also taking volunteers who want their vital signs checked and possibly blood drawn in the future. I'm just kidding about the blood draws, but seriously if you want your vital signs checked to make sure you're still alive, hit me up. "I'm really good at this". You'd get that if you were in my class. 

Totally serious about the vital signs. 

I love you all! 

-Jessica 

Nepal part 2 PLEASE READ AMD SHARE

So I know I briefly talked about what was going on in Nepal and how desperately we needed to pray for them, but I wanted to talk about it a little bit more. Nepal has been apart of my life for as long as I can remember. My grandparents have probably been to Nepal at least twenty times over the span of say, fifteen years. My grandma has many many many friends there and people that she has grown to love and that my family has grown to love, and we don't know if they are okay. I have been to Nepal twice and I still remember a lot of it. Nepal is kind of like Africa. It needs more attention drawn to it then it receives. Nepal is a third world country. No one has clean water because their main source of water comes from the Bagmati River. The Bagmati River is gross. It is filled with trash; it is where everyone bathes, it is where the animals bathe, it is where the ashes of the deceased get pushed into, and I'm sure there is quite a bit of human waste in there as well. And this is what they are drinking. Nepal is also one of the few societies that still use a caste system. The lowest class are the untouchables. And it is clear when you are there who they are. They are the ones eating out of the trash because they can't get jobs. They are the homeless people on the streets. They are the ones putting their children on the side of the road, hoping someone will take them because that's one more mouth that they cannot feed. Nepal still has a huge amount of lepracy. And lepracy is scary. They are cast outs who beg for money on the side of the road. Some of them don't have noses, or fingers, or toes, or majority of their legs. Lepracy is real and it Still lives in Nepal. Nepal is so poor that the equivalent of one dollar there (rupies) is one penny here. And just recently, Nepal over threw the king and became a democratic society. When I was there, the king still ruled. The pollution is so bad there that when you blow your nose, it's black. This is real. This isn't Africa. It's the forgotten country of Nepal. 

And now the earthquake has hit this country that was struggling immensely already. The death toll has risen to nearly 4,000. Still, a majority of the people we know are unaccounted for. One of my moms friends from high school lives in Kathmandu with her husband, and their two kids, and they are unaccounted for. These are people that we love and care for. 

One of the worst parts of it all is that, I will probably never know if some of the victims are the children I love from the orphanages. And I think there are some of my orphans that lost their life, Just because of the amount of orphans I worked with my two years visiting. Oh, how it breaks my heart. I wish I could just hop on a plane and fly the 32 hours and go and find every last one of those orphans that I love. But, the reality is, is most of the, have aged out of the orphanage by now. And are probably homeless, or have already passed. Very few of those kids I worked with are still under 18. And when they are 18, they can't stay at the orphanage anymore. These kids have no family, no money, and no where to go. And this is real. And this is Nepal. And these kids aren't adoptable. Nepal has strict rules on who can adopt. It's almost impossible to adopt a child from Nepal because believe me, if it was easier, we would have taken some home with us. But this is life. This is their lives. And we don't know if they are okay or not. And it breaks my heart. I look at all my pictures and I remember each kid and the time we spent together. Some kids I saw two years in a row. I know them by name and yet, I don't know their safety. 

So I ask you to please read this and pray for the safety of all of our loved ones. Please continue to pray and please share this. Share the heck out of this page. Let people know that it's not just some random place, it's a place that we need to hold near and dear to our hearts. And that these victims have names and stories and loved ones. They have a face and they are real. Because Nepal is real. And it needs our help right now. I'm going to attach some more pictures now, with a few more faces with names that you can pray for. We love these kids. This is so real to my family and I. It's so uncontrollably heartbreaking for us to face the reality that not everyone is okay. Hey, smiles from the mountain hotel, I hope you're safe. Hey, guard that opened the door for us, and we had an unspoken friendship that lasted two years, I hope you're okay. These are people that are real. This place, no matter how far away, is real, especially to my family. Please, please, please, continue to share and pray. Let the world know, that Nepal needs our prayers. 

Sita, is the little one In the hat. She is eating Dahl baut which is what most Nepalis eat. We spent two years with her. She's probably 12 now. 

These are some of our favorite boys. The one behind me name is Shankar, and he was so sweet. And the one next to me name is Jala. We sponsored Jala. The boy next to Meaghan was also one of our sweet boys we saw two years in a row. 

This little boy has a family. His moms name is Geta. I painted this a few years back and it's currently in my parents bedroom. This little boy is probably six now. 

Last, but not least, is Bebic. Oh how we love Bebic. Bebic has enough personality and charisma for the entire world. We met him our second year and we all fell in love with him. He was so funny and sweet. He called me Barbie the whole time. 

Thank you for reading this post. Again please share and spread the word. Show the world these faces. The world needs to see these faces. 

I love you all!

-Jessica